Home Birth

Before I post about Capri’s birth, I want to write a post about what led us to a home birth. I want my next post to just be about her birth and not about the location...

As soon as I finished Fall final exams, I got a stack of books from the library about birth. Spencer’s birth was tough because his head was enormous and he weighed 10 lbs 8 oz. I wanted to find out if there was anything I could do to make the next birth more manageable. I had a ton of anxiety about it, so much that I couldn’t sleep. Facing my fears seemed like a good way to spend my long nights. I read a bunch of books during those sleepless nights.

Something that most books suggested was to write a birth plan. Somewhere in the process of writing a birth plan, I considered everything that I didn’t like about my previous births. That helped me think about what I wanted to do different this time. I didn’t want to be induced. I didn’t want to be physically forced to push on my back. I didn’t want an IV or even a hep-lock. I didn’t want to be stuck in bed strapped to monitors. I didn’t want an episiotomy or drugs. I didn’t want to feel rushed. I didn’t want to be told when I could start pushing or how to push. I absolutely didn’t want my baby to be taken from me, at all… ever. I didn’t want the cord to be cut for a long time. I didn’t want anything that might lead to a C-section. I didn't want to be told that I couldn't eat or drink or go to the bathroom. I didn’t want to sleep in a hospital bed. I didn’t want hospital food. At some point, I realized that I simply didn’t want to be in a hospital at all. I didn’t want anything the hospital had to offer… I didn’t want the side effects and risks of what the hospital had to offer. I have so many reasons for not wanting all of the above that it would take me forever to write about them all. So if anyone wants more details, then we might need to have a conversation instead. Or you can ask me questions in the comments. I will say that none of my reasons have anything at all to do with wanting to be tough or not caring deeply about the risks. My reasons had everything to do with what I felt was best for me and my baby.

I read about home births and it sounded wonderful. I wanted to be at home. I wanted to be where I feel comfortable and relaxed. I wanted my baby to benefit from the hormones that my body makes when I am comfortable and relaxed. I wanted my boys to have the option of attending the birth of their little sister. I wanted to do a water birth because water helps me relax and would help me sustain optimal pushing positions. I wanted to be allowed to do whatever felt right to me during labor.

But I had a long list of questions/fears about home birth. So I addressed everything one at a time… meconium aspiration, group B strep, a family history of fatal birth defects (my oldest sister died because of a heart defect and my younger sister died from complications related to kidney failure), my health, cord prolapse, cord around the neck, breech baby, a transport plan, hemorrhaging, placenta previa, shoulder dystocia, tearing... I did a ton of research. I had already done more tests and ultrasounds with my OB/GYN then I ever wanted to do but it all turned out to be reassuring information. Sometimes it felt like I hit a dead end and a hospital birth was inevitable. But I refused to leave any stones unturned and one by one, my fears were resolved… until there were no fears anymore and then Wayne and I felt peace. We felt confident. We felt excited!

I found an awesome, skilled, and experienced midwife who spent four hours with me on our first visit. Wayne and I researched coping techniques. We had a bag full of tricks (and practiced some of them) but our main plan was for me to get in a zone, listen to my body, and do whatever felt right.

We looked into renting or purchasing a birthing pool but by the time Wayne got in the water, there would have been no room left for me! So Wayne found a four person, relatively inexpensive hot tub on Craig’s list. We liked the idea of being able to filter the water and regulate the temperature. We drove an hour away to pick it up. Wayne, Trinton, and Andrew lifted it on top of our van and strapped it down tight. We looked ridiculous driving home! It was nice to relax in the hot tub at night and be able to fit my big belly under water. Wayne said it was the first time since he was a little kid that he was able to fit his whole body under water inside a house! We didn’t have anywhere to put it inside our house except in the dining room. So we condensed the dining table, stored some of our dining chairs upstairs, and ate dinner every night right next to where we planned to welcome our baby girl! The hot tub looked ridiculous in our dining room but we didn’t care.

I spent a ton of time gathering two big bins full of birthing supplies… natural remedies, relaxation tools, and receiving blankets and towels ready for the oven. I finished organizing our supplies on a Thursday night and the next morning…